Ain’t no relationship expert but I do know that this is a sensitive, trivial topic: shoot your shot and your opinion is important just as you are… Hit me up with them in the comment section.


Before we get down deep to the topic, let’s understand what’s shoot your shot. According to urban dictionary shoot your shot means sliding into Dm (Direct Message), signalling you want to hook up with the person, more like showing interest in the individual.


Invariably shooting your shot has been there time immemorial but with different name and thinking back(High school- Secondary school or even primary school ) …. I think it was through letter exchange, copying note or being so extra nice to someone, having lunch together or sitting across each other and throwing/catching glances at intervals , basically called crush(I stand to be corrected though) but as grown up, no one is expected to do things like that and that’s where the shoot your shot slogan comes up.

I would like to ask a few questions

  • Is a lady allowed to shoot her shot?
  • Is shooting your shot just for the guys alone?
  • Is it biblically ok for Christian lady who likes someone to shoot her shot?
  • Does African Culture permit ladies to shoot their shot.
  • Are the guys ok when the ladies shoot their shot at them?
  • How do they feel? Reactions…
  • Does shooting shot relate to transactional sex?(which the internet is buzzing about now btw)
  • Can shooting your shot be perceived as Sexual Harassment?
  • If yes, at what point is it seen as that?
  • What’s the difference between persistently shooting your shot and sexual harassment?

Feel free to answer any or all of the questions .

On SMs especially Twitter, things like these are seen and some frown against it while some others welcome the idea with points and stories of ladies who shot their shot and are happily married and guys who equally did and have no regrets.

Being an African and understanding the culture to an extent plus being a Christian,  it’s an action believed not to be carried out by the ladies… it’s seen as a man’s job, probably because of the following reasons

  1. Ladies shouldn’t  be heard
  2. A lady shooting her shot signifies that she’s super bold and might be seen as being in charge when it’s a man’s right to be in charge…. like be the head.
  3. In some scenario,  the man can bring it up both jokingly and seriously assuming they end up married as he was wooed by the woman and not he that wooed the woman which might not go down well later with the woman in question.
  4. It’s called bride-price and not groom-price, though I learnt in some countries and cultures,  the woman pays the dowry.
  5. The bible says in proverbs 18:22 “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favour from the lord- NIV ” not she who finds a man finds…..

But before shooting your shot scenario, there has to be a form of feeling-likening and is this likening not supposed to be a two way thing?

Are there no case studies where some men are shy and too reserved to shoot their shot to the lady they like? In such study, wouldn’t it be proper for the lady in question to shoot the shot, thereby helping out the shy, reserved man?

Like I already mentioned, ain’t no relationship expert but having seen and read up some stories prior to this post, I can say cultures can be modified and these are forms I have read on SMs a woman can shoot her shot without letting her whatever down and I think it might be applicable to the guys too.


As seen on Twitter…the girl shot her shot and they are married


Other forms could be inviting him over for lunch or dinner, getting gifts though it might still not mean a shot is being shot



Came across this 👇


Let the conversation begin, share your opinion and you never can tell what good will come out of it.

Is it ok to shoot your shot?

Share the link to your friends, let’s talk about it…

See you in the comment section and next post.

Update: Have you seen this beautiful happily ever after story that started from “shoot your shot?”

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